Tessa Lorraine
As National Caregivers Month comes to a close, a focus on not just how to give care, but take care, is warranted.
Take care of yourself.
These aren't easy words to embrace when juggling, work, family, life and caregiving of a loved one. While these words may be difficult to embrace, they are a start for you, as a caregiver, to get what you need to manage your role as a caregiver while mitigating the effects of stress.
Signs of caregiver stress include exhaustion, feelings of being overwhelmed, anxiety, loneliness, sadness, hopelessness, skipping personal care, substance abuse and trouble sleeping. This is not an exhaustive list, but marks the most common forms of caregiver stress.
Monitor these risk factors early in your caregiving experience, as leaving them unattended increases the risk of physical and mental health issues, sleep problems and chronic conditions, among other health issues.
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Another critical element to caregiving is seeking help when needed. It may not be easy to ask for help once you've stepped into your role as a caregiver. That people want to help is a good place to start framing how you prioritize when or if to ask for help.
The National Institute on Aging recommends asking for small things or breaking larger jobs into smaller, simpler tasks and spread them out. Be prepared with a list of things that need to be done. Give people the option of what they're able to do and interested in doing.
It's also important to be honest about what you need and don't need. Practicing these strategies will help build up your caregiver management skills.
Most importantly, make time for you! Taking care of yourself and your needs provides strength to take care of others.
Practice any, all or just a few of the following self-care steps to make sure you're in a good place to take on caregiving responsibilities for others. The National Institutes of Health recommend the following self-care practices:
Be active: Find (or don't give up) activities you enjoy.
Eat well: A balanced diet includes a variety of healthy foods.
Prioritize sleep: Develop a bedtime routine aiming to get seven to nine hours of sleep a night.
Reduce stress: Find ways to relax that work for you; tai chi, meditation and yoga are just a few examples of stress reduction. Do whatever works best for you.
Make (not find) time to relax: Carve out time to do activities that matter to you and relax you.
Keep up with your own health: Make and keep medical appointments. Tell your care team you are a caregiver. Your team can likely provide resources to assist in your caregiving journey.
Reach out for support: Seek trusted friends, relatives or a mental health professional for conversations about your caregiving experience.
Take a break: Ask someone, even a paid caregiver, to step in to take care of your loved one. This can be an aide coming in a few hours a week or a trusted friend or family member. Keep a list of those you trust; keep them on a rotating basis for when you need some time for you.
Be kind to yourself: This can be the hardest strategy to employ. Find time to connect with whatever you're feeling: sadness, frustration, guilt. These are all potential feelings that come with caregiving.
The National Institutes of Health provide a Caregiver's Handbook. Download or order free copies at order.nia.nih.gov/publication/caregivers-handbook.
Tessa Lorraine is program manager at Rianda House. She holds a master's degree in gerontology and serves on the Napa County Commission on Aging. She lives in Napa with her beagle, Biscuit. To volunteer with Rianda House, call Tessa at 707-963-8555 ext. 103.
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