A care home worker who gave the wrong medication to a resident who later died feels fully responsible, a court has heard.
Jane Barnard, 66, denies the manslaughter of Derek Davies, 75, who lived at the care home where she was employed and died on September 8 2021.
Mr Davies died after Barnard mistakenly gave him medication prescribed for another patient, Jason Dodsworth, including 90mg of slow-release morphine.
A trial at Gloucester Crown Court heard Barnard failed to report her mistake and lied to colleagues and medical professionals to conceal what she had done, even after Mr Davies fell ill and was taken to hospital.
The following day, she tried to confess at a church, where she was on the cleaning rota.
"I thought I could go to church and tell someone what had happened," she told the court.
"I did go... I started cleaning, but they were doing technical stuff in the church and they were really busy.
"I didn't get the opportunity to say anything."
The court also heard Barnard listened to a Christian podcast in the days following the incident, and rang a friend to tell her what had happened, who agreed she would "pray for Derek".
Barnard, of Longlevens, Gloucester, was employed as a care worker at Wheatridge Court in Abbeydale, Gloucester, where Mr Davies was a resident when he died.
She has pleaded guilty to a second charge that she wilfully neglected Mr Davies between September 5 and September 9 that year by failing to disclose she had wrongfully administered morphine.
Asked if she believes she bears responsibility for Mr Davies' death, Barnard said "totally".
"I didn't believe he would die," she added.
The court heard that on the morning of September 6, Barnard erroneously gave him medication prescribed for another patient, Mr Dodsworth.
Having quickly realised her mistake, Barnard disposed of the medication Mr Davies should have received and pretended the medication she did give him, intended for Mr Dodsworth, had been dropped down the sink.
"I remember going into the bathroom area just to get my head together," she told the court.
"I was sat there for some time, just beside myself... I knew I had to compose myself.
"Everything was going through my mind, my family, Derek, everything."
Barnard said she was in a "state" and could not bring herself to tell colleagues or her husband what she had done.
On September 8, two days after the incident, Barnard rang Kim Jones, deputy manager of the home, to tell her she had given Mr Davies the wrong medication.
When the care home contacted the hospital, it was confirmed Mr Davies had died that morning.
The original cause of death was documented as a brainstem stroke but it was later understood Mr Davies' actual cause of death was a consequence of morphine toxicity.
At the time of the incident, Barnard had been employed as a care worker at Wheatridge Court for 32 years.